The thing about perspective is that its doesn’t need to be based on facts. It is our interpretation of a situation based on how it made us feel at the time, how it affected us, how the situation reflects or pushes against our value system.
When we see things differently than others, and are angered that they just don’t get are side. When we a have strong opinion about someone or something they have done. When we are really mad that someone would do that to us or say that. Often our perspective is on how we feel and not on the actual facts gathered from the offending party. Often the immediate story we tell ourselves, lays the ground work of a perspective that will change and evolve as calmer more rational thoughts and ideas percolate.
Perspective coaching, helps you recognize when an idea, thought or feeling is based from actual fact or is a reaction that is based off of not only the situation at hand, but the mental space you are in at the time it happens. For example, its been a crap week, the kids were sick, you didn’t get groceries on the weekend so you have been behind all week. You had a fight with your husband and the dog peed on the floor. You go to the school to drop off your child’s lunch and the secretary is rude and has no time for you. You walk away with the perspective that she is terrible at her job and for some reason doesn’t like you. At a different time, when a week is going well and things are running smoothly, you may walk in and sense the secretary is having a hard day and seems overwhelmed, maybe you even acknowledge how hard her job must be and that you appreciate her commitment to your child’s school. She may turn and say, thanks for that you just made a hard day a little easier. You walk away and your perspective could be, that lady’s mood wasn’t about me at all, I’m glad I could give her a little appreciation and it was really nice to make her smile.
Our emotions can play a big part in are perspective, often once we have time to reflect or even get to know someone better or why they acted in the way that they did can cause a change in perspective.
Perspective coaching encourages us to look at our part in a situation, helps us look through a different lens and helps us learn how to deal with things in the future, without jumping to conclusions and creating isolated perspectives, based on opinion as opposed to facts. Perspective coaching can help with business situations, family interactions and personal relationships. Someone who is willing to change their perspective, put themselves in the other persons shoes, wants learn from a situation as opposed to hold onto it, is moving toward their best life.
At the end of the day, its not the challenges life throws at us that define our character, its how we choose to react and deal with them.